Welcome :)

Greeting to all of you reading this. Even though we don't really know each other but still i like you to give this to you and accept my gift of friendship. This heartwarming blogger award was given by Gitta, as close online friend.

HOW TO ACCEPT AWARD:

must thank the person who gave you this award

display the award logo

nominates up to 9 bloggers that make you feel comfy and warm inside

link to your nominees

let them know they have nominated by tagging or commenting

I will pass this award to the following friends:

Gitta

Amelia

Chihaya

Aehlyn

Klaire

Khalline

Yherika

Helena

Jiayi

Last Friday was the BIG night for me, i spend most of my time with friends and i enjoyed it soo much that i wished it was a long night. All we do is take pictures again and again. Roaming around and around our small campus in our school. It was fun being with friends and people there are having an amazing costumes. It suppose to be a Halloween party but its November so it turn now to Costume Party.
The longer the time, the time get so boring and i also got tired of it. But the moment i been waiting is at night, the beautiful dark night i admired so much and too bad we don't have disco. But at least we have fun.

One of my blog friend given me a gift in return and it soo cute and it's Gitta, who gave it to me. I love teddy bear and it's the cutest gift i have received from a good friend.
I was the one first give gifts to my two blog friends, Gitta and Amelia, their were nice friends and i hope we'll be still befriends.

weeh~ November, the second day of this month, i have not went to cemetery to visit my grandparents just because i was lazy and love spending at home surfing the 'net the whole day, so mean.

I change again my layout since i realized my two new friends(who became my close chatmate online) informed that the color was too bright and i know it hurts in the eyes. So i managed time to change everything in a same code but only i only change the image banner above my layout and also the color. The past layout was used for a short time(poor layout i made). I pick the cutest color baby blue and actually i wouldn't wanted to be suspected as a ripper(nope) i give credits to her blogskin of Sipie from where i got it from this site. I hope she would be mad about this or maybe i should confront this.

As i wanted to blog about is, I have knew some goods affiliates from different blog site and it's nice to know how their lives about. I meet new friends commenting from my tagboard and each time i open my blogspot i felt like i was welcome enough and i thought for that having tagboard is lame but i was wrong and i had in mind at first that maybe i should have this blog in private but i think i should exposed it, nothing would be wrong if i do so, right? For me, this is a diary to share about your world and i think that blogging is way better than writing it to you personal dairy book. While i thought things in the internet that some just post things like image rather than typing, it's not a big deal anyway but i mean,"how do you express things in your blog?", another thing i observed that people liketo managed a contest like STOM( dont know what's the acronym) but i think its just for fun but its just a waste of time having that. This is just an opinion of mine, well, awards doesn't matter to me, by the way. I don't get pride for having the first place price.
The word contest is irritates me, this is the reason why people fights for and it makes them crazy. I hope you understand. I mean this for being fairness after all.
Being fair doesn't mean to be equal to each other but i wanted to say is "respect for each other". And back from what i said, for me contest is a not thing for me that because again "I don't get pride for being the top one".

I'm so happy that we gave a school vacation at a limited time and its much okay than to have a one day rest. We have it for five days to do what we want but still there is a irritation about it because teacher gives us a damn homework to do and ask us to brought our stupid books at home. It made me feel tired things repeating over and over again saying in a sweet tone ugly tone "please studying hard and reading your lessons in advance". Oh how i wish i never went to school though i know it's for my own good.
I was never been a good student since i started schooling at my early age, i had low grade 'till then and physically not active at everything, i mean it. I was not the perfect person or an average one but i was the "most" stupid one in the entire student body. I admit that it is impossible for me to reach everything in life. Life was not easy still I'm here doing what everyone wants me to do and pushes me even though i hate it most in my life. I just wish to be someone lives in a happy peaceful life but then again i know its impossible.

First day of school vacation, yesterday, was fun because i finished the vampire knight episode i have watch since sunday. It was a fantastic anime and madly to know the end because i think everything will continue to a new season and I'll wait for it.

Second day of vacation was so sleepy and i spent about more than an hour sleeping in bed so tiring... and my aunt and I went to repair my lame cellphone having a problem. It took about one and a half hours fixing but failed and we let it check to another person who could fix it and he said we could get it by tomorrow because he'll spend it fixing the phone by programming it.

I come to realize how fast this days have come and go. It gives a freaky feeling that after five months we'll graduate in high school so bye bye high school life.
This time i spent my life going to school though it's tiring. I had in mind what will it be looking at myself in the future.

I feel broken easily and never be fixed, wish i would die and not to live as i was started to born. in this world. Why God gave me life when all obstacle i faced would not be accomplish. All i know that i have a mission but with no direction to know. I was judged, insulted and damped by others and felt hatred for myself and not them. I was the one to be blame and ashamed, where would i lead my way if this things makes me look at myself feeling miserable as i compare to others. Am i the only person who would never stands up? I wished i need to be strong and wise but i was always looking at the other side knowing that i will never be the person that would help strengthen me.

Now that i realized my personal life i been through, how i wished God can give me another chance to renew again to a new beginning. How i wished i would do my best to become a better person and today it is too late, too late to be sorry and this i lost my own faith not only in myself but also to God. I should have known at the beginning that this would happen and i should changed right away the way i was.
I cannot accept the fact that this is my life, my story, my fate and myself that i would not believe in me. I wanted to die and do things again. Life may not be perfect but as long as we are living, never take things on its own way that would make things difficult.